Saturday, February 16, 2013
On most days this is how I feel. Peaking out to see if it's safe to proceed forward. On most days I am afraid when the phone rings. If it rings during the night I awake with a fear nothing can ease. It unnerves me to the end and I can not go back to sleep. When I am at work and my cell rings, my heart stops beating. Are all these things a normal process of death and dying? I suppose that some people don't really care about this part of life and chalk it up to life in general. Everyone of us is going to die at some point. How and where is unknown.
The other night I was listening to the radio on the way home from work and the host on the radio was talking about how he left that morning and kissed his wife goodbye. He never thought he would not see her again. But it was just that thought that crossed his mind. What if? What if you left your home this morning on your way to do whatever, and you never saw your loved ones again? What would you do differently this morning? Would you spend more time making breakfast for them? Kiss, hug and tell them you loved them like it was the last time you would ever see them?
The point is it's not about what you would miss, its about how they would miss you. You would be gone forever. They would have to stand by and carry on. Would you want the last memory of you to be arguing with your kids at the school drop off? Nagging at your husband/wife about a chore that was not done properly? Complaining about your lack of money to buy a very unneeded object? I think we are all guilty of all those things. It is impossible to live every day like it is your last on earth. But I think we can do better. Life is precious. Don't wait until you are dying to express how you feel. And don't take life for granted thinking you have one more day to do all those things and make things right. You may never get the chance. Make things right now. Going to your grave without sharing your true feelings will leave your loved ones always wondering.